slacker

So apparently I haven't made Blogging enough of a priority lately. I recieved notices from both my momand sister to step it up. okay they said it nicer more like it would be nice to see an update but you know. Anyways i digress. i haven't been blogging because I have been to busy proving to myself that i can do three kids, and that i don't have to give up life as I knew it to do so. I am pretty tired as a result, but I also feel like i could take on the world! I mean I went to the mall a couple of weeks ago with all three and it was a successful trip including potty training staying on track, a feet that beats me most days.

I am finding being a Mom of three, three and under is really fulfilling. i don't have much idle time and I am likeing that. I am finding myslef implementing more routine. Not that I have ever digressed from that much for those that know me. But I am enjoying having goals in mind each day, a better focus.

Evan goes to a home playschool that I belong to with 4 other mom's, twice a week. i workout at an arobics class put on by a lady in our stake twice a week ( goal in mind there- get thin again!) And Fridays we take it easy at home catch up on laundry etc... Naps every afternoon of course and some sort of outside activity afterwards, dinner, bath, bedtime. Within this new found routine I have been able to make better use of my time. I am finding the time to give each of my very special children thier own time with Mommy. Vienna and I have started to have a little date while Evan is at school and Seger sleeps. Seger gets lots of time being held and nursed. and Evan and I play for a bit after the other two go to sleep.

The last week or so of doing this has made me remember in those moments when i have just yelled at them, that maybe they don't need the mad Mommy. I came to this conclusion becasue the more time I get with them that is focused the more I am discovering my kids, thier spirits. Evan has become such a tender heart. he expreses it in a whiny manner sometimes which can be wearing, but if I remember that his little spirit just has hurt feelings it is so much easier to deal with. He is so loving always giving me hugs and kisses. Vienna is still sassy which is also wearing, but then I realize she must just have this larger then life spirit in this tiny little petite body of hers just burstin out. Then I smile and just think of myself when I was little. Seger is waking up! The lights are turning on and he is recognizing us and we are getting to know him. I love his little sly grins!

So what i am saying is that I love each of them and that all this structure I am becoming a better Mom then i was. It very much reminds me of the gosple. The gosple is a very structured entity and for good reason. the Lord is making us all beter people. He loves us and he already knows or beautiful and large spirits. All this realization makes me want to goa nd sit and read the scriptures for hours. If a little is good alot must be better!